Today we celebrated the seventh birthday of our Littlest Ladies. We always seem to do it in March even though their birthday is in February. In a way though, it’s fitting. They were born in February but we didn’t get to enjoy them at home until March.
The Twins were born at 33 weeks and spent a month in the NICU. Longest month of my life and most of it is a blur. We did our best to make the most of a rough situation though and I’m forever grateful to our amazing team of Doctors, Nurses, Aides, and even the sweet ladies in the cafeteria. We were so blessed to have supportive family and friends. Even coworkers who came and visited us in the hospital. I look back on that time with immense gratitude. I am humbled by the love and care that we received.
I’ll never forget our first night in the hospital after the pain killers and crazy meds from the c-section had mostly worn off. I tried to pump to make milk for my babies and came away with barely anything. I sobbed and felt like a failure. My body had already failed once and here I was failing again. (Postpartum guilt is a bitch Ya’ll.) I’d seen The Twins right after they wheeled me out of surgery but then we were taken in two different directions and I was stoned out of my gourd. My babies weren’t even on the same floor as me.
It was 2am but I wanted my babies and I was a mess. Donny’d been told that he could visit the NICU anytime. He groggily made his way to their floor and FaceTimed with me as long as I needed so I could see our sweet little girls. I took screenshots so I’d have pictures. Only later did I realize that my crazy faces were in the shots haha! They were so incredibly tiny but we knew they were healthy and strong. They were born fighters.
On March 24th after weeks of praying and hours spent in the hospital we were blessed to bring our itty bitty Mag Pie home. She was so tiny and felt so strange to hold without all of those wires and tubes. She was so little that we had to roll the sleeves on her premie pjs.
The next day we got the call that The Trash Goblin had passed all of her tests during the night and was able to come home. We were overjoyed and so excited and scared shitless. We finally felt like Twin parents. We were home and on our own.
I can look back now on those NICU days and feel pride in how we handled it as a team despite how hard it was. I look back on them with gratitude for the acts of kindness big and small that we were given. It’s been seven years of daily learning. Some days are amazing and some days are insane but I am so grateful for the opportunity to experience all of it. One thing I can say with certain, I’d go through it all again for these girls without hesitation. Being their Mom is 100% worth every struggle, tear cried, and frustration experienced along the way.
Happy Birthday baby girls. Mommy loves you.
Mom Van Confessions 