The Boy

A while back I read the kids all of the posts that I’d written. The Boy made me promise that I’d write one about him. When I told him that everyone had a nickname instead of a real name he tried to convince me that his nickname should be “Naked Boy” because he doesn’t like to wear clothes. I told him that people would get the wrong idea and “The Boy” would have to do for now. After a few minutes of discussion he agreed and then gave me a kiss goodnight and burrowed into his covers. He’s usually like that, quiet and good natured.

His comedic timing is sometimes a surprise although he’s often funny when he doesn’t mean to be. Of my two older kiddos, he has the most energetic imagination. He loves to dress up and reinvent himself as various ridiculous superheroes. This weekend it was “Aqua Parrot!” He wore two capes which he spread out like wings, a stuffed spear around his neck/head that jutted out in front of his face like a beak (to make him look like a parrot and as a convenient way to carry his weapon), ninja turtle briefs, and cowboy boots. He also rode a giant stuffed parrot. (Only he could make this up.) He told us that he could fly around and make things blow up. Also he could go under water because he’s like Aqua Man. Another time he used his underwear like a utility belt and wore a bicycle helmet, goggles, and a cape. (Shout out to Hanes for making little boy underwear with enough elastic to hold a spear, a lightsaber, a tape measure and a walker talkie at the same time.)

He is obsessed with dinosaurs and Jurassic Park. When we told him there were two babies in my belly he told us that he hoped they were dinosaurs. You can imagine his disappointment when he learned that they were girl babies and not dinosaurs at all. He’s the only boy in a family filled with girls. I thank God all the time that he’s the oldest. I think if he was the youngest he’d be a spoiled brat. He’s mostly well mannered with some sass and backtalk thrown in there on occasion. He likes to help me cook and we watch “Pasta Grannies” on Youtube together. We’re low-key obsessed with pasta and how it’s made. We’ll try it ourselves eventually. We also like to watch Chopped reruns and argue about who is going to win.

At 6 years old he’s only a foot and a half shorter than me and can almost fit in my tennis shoes. He’s going to dwarf me in no time. Hopefully he continues to be a good kid. I imagine it will take some of the effectiveness out of my fussing at him if I have to look up at him to do it. He has a soft heart and gets upset pretty easily if you fuss at him. He likes to draw pictures and write notes for people to read later. He also likes to dance and is absolutely terrible at it. We encourage him anyway. I even taught him how to Vogue. When he’s older I’ll teach him that if you hold a drink in your hand and dance badly then people just assume you’re drunk and you can enjoy yourself without being bothered or needing a DD at the end of the night. (You know, the important stuff.)

Like his Daddy and Crazy Eyes, he’s quick to tell his family “I love you!” anytime the mood strikes. He sometimes drives me insane but what kid doesn’t? Quite often he is the unknowing instructor of my frequent “lessons in patience and love.” When we first met he was more interested in Daddy to pay me much attention but he’s come around. It makes me happy to know that, if God is willing, I’ll get to continue to watch him grow into a man. Let’s just hope that by then he wears more clothing, at least in public.