A Letter to My Twins

Dear Tiny Babies,

Please, please slow down. You are the first and last children that I will carry in my body and while I love to celebrate your every milestone I also selfishly mourn because they are milestones I will never get the chance to celebrate again. So I get just the once with you. An ironic thought because there are two of you.

While some nights the exhaustion makes me want to scream, I try hard not to say “I can’t wait till you get bigger.” The truth is I can wait. I want to make sure that I drink in every single thing and don’t let it go. I wish I could record every little funny moment, every snuggle, every new thing you do. I find it impossible to imagine you as anything but the babies that you are now. My sweet, chunky cheeked little monkeys. I can’t picture you as a toddler even although you’re already pulling up on everything and trying to crawl all over the place.

Sometimes in the middle of the night I pad into your room as quiet as I can just to check and make sure you’re still breathing. You are beautiful and perfect. On the days when I am at my worst, you and your siblings make me keep trying for my best. You are only nine months old and through your very existence have taught me more about love and perseverance and myself than the whole of my life combined. I love that you are so very much alike and yet so different.

So please, slow down my tiny babies. Stay little just a little while longer. Let me snuggle you and give you kisses and enjoy you being small.

Mommy loves you Stinky Toots!